Seriously Anonymous….are you even real? I keep reading your post and it’s evident that we share the same views on life and that is not something I find often in men today. You are so right in that technology has made a big difference in how we communicate and meet people. While it can offer convenience, it can also be cold and impersonal. I find so little satisfaction in it.
M a 58yr old guy who has been divorced for 11 years. I like Debbie have tried the dating sites, I have approached women in stores (they freak). I have my own business, been told Im a very good looking man, Im in shape and yes I can still make love, Im functional. But I have found women my age are afraid to open up to a relationship as they are set in their ways of being alone and single. Im not into bed hoping, Im looking for ONE single lady who wants a good man, loves to kiss, hold hands and yes still wants sex. I have about given up as its hard to find a woman who wants a good solid grounded man. Lonely in Colorado Springs, CO
These women who make comments like “it’s my turn” and “time for me” sound very selfish and bitter. That’s a turn-off for me to hear this self-centered crapp, and I’m not a guy! What man would want to respond to profiles like that?
I empathize Rob. If a now single, middle-age woman had money in her past relationship(s), she’ll want to keep it that way. And if she didn’t, well, she’ll probably seek out financial security in a mate now. I’m NOT saying this as a criticism, just as a fact of life…perhaps in the same way men allegedly only want youth and beauty.
Denise…..men complain that women are superficial, but some men are just as superficial as women, if not more so.
@old man, you talk something about ‘sexism’ and ‘old women’s’ thinking…!! It is NOT about age, or bill, or sexism – it is EVERYTHING about your expectations, manners ad values!! It said A LOT about you, BUT nothing much about your dates, except some woman have higher expectations and some have lower expectations from a date they date… I personally wouldn’t even date a man who would insist to split the bill on the first date( would probably pay it all and give him money for the next date, to not embarrass himself!) NOT because he is obviously a poor chap, but because – if he doesn’t even make an effort in the VERY beginning of relationship, don’t expect much from him when time will go on… simple!
I have the stamina and grounding to make it for the long haul, but that doesn’t seem to be important or appreciated. It really is hard to think of trusting again, but I have faith that I may just find one of you good guys some day. Men can’t all be jerks out there.
I think some men like to date much younger women to boost their ego. In their 40’s and 50’s or the so-called mid life, some men need affirmation that they are still young and viable. I truly think some men have that mid-life crisis to where they feel the need to reassess themselves and their life. Being able to date younger women makes some men feel desired and still in the game. Just my opinion based on countless articles I’ve read and people I know and talk to.
6. It is fairly normal to discuss your marriage breakdown on the first date. Both people are generally pretty shocked to find themselves in this situation and, after talking about the weather and the challenges of getting down the A303 or whatever, it is probably the first significant thing you have in common.
Hay! I admit physical attraction still plays a big part of the original interest. I am financially secure, a good communicator and listener, and sensitive. I always wanted an equal to converse with and also dual support. Looks help the start but mean little long term.
Dating isn't necessarily the formal affair it was when you were younger, so don't assume that you need to get your best suit ready, buy flowers, or get your hair done just to grab a cup of coffee with someone. Similarly, now that you're older, don't expect that things will get physical as fast as they did when you were younger.
Honestly, the majority of people that are middle aged and up are not going to be as fit as they were when they were young, don’t recover as fast or at all from the physical, mental and emotional injuries that occur in life. There’s really no need to assume that it is an individual’s fault that they are single at whatever stage of life they find themselves due to unworthiness, lest we also be be prejudged in the same manner. Neither is there any reason to treat others in that ‘boat’ with unkindness when we find they are not for us, lets just move on without blame or rancor.
I am not a divorcé. I am a widow. My husband died way too young. We had a very successful marriage. I husband was a unique, highly intelligent, flexible, considerate, sensitive human being who overcame his weaknesses because of his love for me and how much he valued our relationship. So, what I am saying here is that I am not a “man hater,”
You actually know of a rational woman! That’s an oxymoron by definition. I bet you think woman don’t lie either!?!
The Truth Teller…..it is sad that we women can’t find decent men because the lot of us are judged as you have described. I work to support myself so I am not looking for money. I am looking for a kind, loving partner. As long as he can support himself and is happy with what he does, that’s fine by me. From a man I expect a little chivalry and a lot of respect. Take me out and give me flowers once in a while. That doesn’t mean he has to be rich. I’ve been in love with several men who were not loaded with money. That didn’t matter to me because I judge by what is inside a man, not by what he owns.
Evidently at 50 I am missing something too. Can’t find a decent guy around my age who actually cares about having a good, caring, attractive partner. There’s so many good guys out there supposedly, but I can’t find them. I would gladly settle for just one……
If I had a dollar for every time a woman has said to me “You’re a nice guy, and you are really great looking and smart, BUT (FILL IN THE BLANK OF HOW I DO NOT FIT HER CHECKLIST)” I’d be richer than Gates, man.
